majorcatfish
Garden Master
dw and i had a good chuckle on this.......
1 A man cut his turkey in half with a chain saw and wanted to know if the oil from the chain would adversely affect the turkey.
2 An Alabama man found a turkey from 1969 in his dad’s freezer. How to cook it? Forget the open roasting pan method – the hotline operator suggested buying a fresher bird.
3 Guests were coming from the Bahamas, and their hostess wanted a “tropical” turkey with a “bikini look.” The Talk-Line operator’s suggestion? Place pieces of aluminium foil over strategic spots on the bird and let the exposed skin “tan” in the oven.
4 Asked what state her turkey was in, the caller told the Talk-Line operator: “Florida.”
5 How to make sure the turkey fits in the pan? A man proudly called the hotline to share his solution: Wrap the turkey in a towel, stomp on it to break the bones and smoosh it into the pan.
6 A guest from Connecticut was coming just to baste the turkey, a caller explained. What to do with the guest, since Butterball’s birds are pre-basted?
7 Where’s the breast meat? Turn the bird over, the Talk-Line operator told the caller.
8 A first-time T-day cook rinsed her bird – with dish soap – and now the suds wouldn't stop. She was told not to rinse the turkey next time; just dry it with paper towels.
9 Could the turkey be slow-roasted for three or four days, a mom asked, because her daughter loved how the bird made the house smell. No, the Talk-Line expert replied, turkey should be cooked for just a few hours – not over four days.
10 A first-time father was worried the turkey had been thawing in the refrigerator too long while his wife was in the hospital giving birth. Asked how much it weighed, the dad replied: “The turkey or the baby?” After getting the bird’s weight and thawing time, the Talk-Line operator was able to tell him the turkey would be fine for Thanksgiving.
Butterball's Turkey Talk-Line opens for the season Nov. 2. Call 800-288-8372 for help.
