Grandparents' Day at School

[so lucky]

DH and I went to Grandparents' day for lunch. We have two kids at the school, second and third grade. The older girl had mentioned that there was a classmate annoying her, following her around all the time, and we got to see this first hand today. Large overbearing very friendly, touchy-feely girl who was all over our grand daughter. Kind of dominated the conversation, declared herself my adopted grand daughter, wanted to hold hands as we went outside. I observed two separate teachers interact with the girl, one of whom detained her when she said the principal gave her permission to go with DH and me to the book fair. (Lying, opportunistic) I got the impression the girl is a "known" problem at the school. I'm just kind of wondering how longer my grandkid will put up with her. I hope it doesn't get ugly. I hope my little darling doesn't start dreading school. Thinking I may speak with her dad about it. I'm not sure how aware he is of the situation, and she doesn't share her feelings very easily. Note to self: Don't go to Grandparents' Day next year.

 

[Smart Red]

Erase that note! Grandparents are special people in our grandchildren's world. The more you are involved in their lives the better people the children will grow up to be.

My heart goes out to that other poor child. You can bet her overbearing attitude is a cry for attention and love. Not that it means anyone should expect her to become your granddaughter's problem. Just that someone in the school system needs to reach out to the child asap.

 

[catjac1975]

DH and I went to Grandparents' day for lunch. We have two kids at the school, second and third grade. The older girl had mentioned that there was a classmate annoying her, following her around all the time, and we got to see this first hand today. Large overbearing very friendly, touchy-feely girl who was all over our grand daughter. Kind of dominated the conversation, declared herself my adopted grand daughter, wanted to hold hands as we went outside. I observed two separate teachers interact with the girl, one of whom detained her when she said the principal gave her permission to go with DH and me to the book fair. (Lying, opportunistic) I got the impression the girl is a "known" problem at the school. I'm just kind of wondering how longer my grandkid will put up with her. I hope it doesn't get ugly. I hope my little darling doesn't start dreading school. Thinking I may speak with her dad about it. I'm not sure how aware he is of the situation, and she doesn't share her feelings very easily. Note to self: Don't go to Grandparents' Day next year.

Let the child handlle it. When parents intervene the chile does nit learn any skills for taking care of herself. I fully believe that is haw kids become victims of bullies-they never learned the skills necessary to deal with it.

 

[so lucky]

I think the girl may end up in "the system" just because she is so different. Possible emotionally challenged or with a mental disorder already. No boundaries apparently. I think I may talk with my grand daughter about being able to speak up if things get too bad for her, rather than just "take it" because she is taught to be tolerant and "nice" to others.
And Red, I know that I am an important figure in the girls' lives. I have tried to be the one person they knew they could count on even when their dad seemed incapable of being a dad, and their mom was missing in action. (not in the service)

 

[journey11]

I'm sorry your special day to visit was ruined by the child's behavior. That is a bummer. I've seen that kind of clingy, obnoxious and improper social behavior a couple of times before in children I have worked with. I would bet money that child is being abused. Sounds like they did not have a grandparent show up for them either? Very sad, but you really couldn't have done anything for her.

 

[hoodat]

That girl is in danger. She's exactly what a child predator is looking for.

 

[thistlebloom]

I think you should talk to your grand daughter, and I suspect you don't need any of us to tell you that, because I'm confident that you already have that kind of relationship.

Kids can't "handle" situations like this without wise counsel from a trusted adult.

 

[Smart Red]

"They" say grandparents and grandchildren get along so well because they both have the same enemy -- the parents. I say it is more that parents see more day to day while grandparents see the future in their grandchildren.

Insurance salespeople have learned the (older) grandparents will do more to insure their wealth, property, and possessions are passed on to the grandchildren than they will to their own children. They see their children as capable of making their own way while the grands will need a bit of a hand up in the future.

Yes, so lucky, I know how much you've done for/with your grands. Just didn't want you spending the next year with that "note to self" in your memory pocket.

 

[digitS']

I would enjoy going to Grandparents' Day. Or, maybe just being a grandparent. I'd probably be nearly oblivious to the goings on at school.

Perhaps, I'm not destined to be a grandparent. DS is mid-40's and single. Shoot, he is old enough to be a grandparent! DD looks for excuses not to have children. I'm okay with that. Certainly, if she doesn't want to make the commitment, she should not have children.

As I grow olde, children have more appeal to me. I have lived near an elementary school for many years. I really enjoy seeing the kids . I can't interact well with them because my hearing is terrible. That's been true for a long time. I just smile - talk to their parents ... if I can do that.

Seeing a future ahead for the children - sure. I remember being a child with other children of their age. I remember my children at their age, I have seen children grow to be adults and have children of their own. Generations. And yes, I have a neighbor of DS' exact age who is a grandparent of two ...

Steve

 

[Smart Red]

Steve, I never knew a grandparent as a child. I adopted one instead. Yup my "Grandpa Thrasher" was actually just a next door neighbor, but we did a lot of the grandpa-grandchild things anyway. I know of one co-worker who married at a later age and became a husband, father, and grandfather all in one day. Of course, that would make you an instant great-grandpa, but there is always hope.

And you are right. There is no excuse to pressure someone into procreating for us. It should be something they want for themselves. You and Mrs. digitS' can always find a family to "adopt" as grandparents as a win-win situation if you try.