Family Restaurant

[Phaedra]

Friday, we got another good hunting. Most of them directly went to the freezer, besides a package of beef and a package of trout. I will use them for making food for all the fur and feather kids.

The cats got some immediately as their dinner.

The beef and trout were cooked with some pumpkin. The next day, fish heads and tails became part of the chicken feed. They also got all the spinach.

And at the end, I used the blender to smash the trout, which was already very soft. The final product is the cookies for dogs - cooked trout, eggs, some minced meat and liver, potato starch, flour, a bit of herb, and gouda cheese.

One molting hen, Hippy, also got her bonus meal, scrambled eggs.

Sunday's special cooking operation

 

[meadow]

Looks like they approve!

 

[baymule]

I bet they all thoroughly enjoyed their treats!

 

[Phaedra]

As dementia develops, many abnormal behaviors will appear. Some are always weird (to us), but some might be considered "philosophical" within the context.

I don't know, and I don't care - I am only interested in what will be in my lunch tomorrow.

My FIL answered this when my husband asked him about Russia's invasion weeks ago. At the much earlier stage, he still felt embarrassed or angry about forgetting things or being incapable of finding the right words to reply. He will now directly say: I don't know/I don't care/I am not interested.

Not that bad, right?

He loves all kinds of sweets so much. A few days ago, I opened a new strawberry jam. It is almost empty today and hidden somewhere. It's still difficult for me to imagine eating jam directly this way.

I heated the rest of the strawberry jam (with a bit of water) and used it as a sauce on the french toast; sausage, broccoli, and cauliflower are the side dish. He finished both.

When my daughter takes care of him (we take turns), he always directly refuses to have any vegetables. Either instantly said, no, I don't like vegetables, don't give me that, or flashed them away in the toilet. However, he didn't refuse vegetables when I was here.

Are you working here?

Another reality is that he didn't recognize me any longer. The only person in the world he still remembers is my husband, his second son. I realized this also quite early because it's not difficult to tell when he stares at me with confusion. Especially when my husband isn't here; I am someone who takes care of cooking and cleaning.

Am I disappointed? Not really. I just met him after the 2014 Christmas. I don't think I played a more important or meaningful role in his life than other family members, careers, or hobbies - and those were all gone. No unrealistic expectations, no unnecessary negative emotions - I am just glad that I can be here to support him at this stage of his journey.

Are you working here?
Yes.
I feel that you are pretty professional.
Really, thank you!

This is his garden, where I learned and made so many mistakes after arriving in Germany. The perennials still thrive.

Some of my plants are still there, too. My FIL prefers those single-color tulips/daffodils; all fancy ones are mine.

Hybrid Tea Rose

A climbing rose, my 2016 birthday gift - I just pruned it about one month ago and treated it as a shrub rose now.

Dementia is something that would force people to live only in the present. It destroys most "proper" cognitions and behaviors built along the decades of socialization; however, it also gifts the possibility to let go some persistence and to embrace the journey with different perspectives.

If that is the case, let's live in the present together.

 

[Rhodie Ranch]

Facing my truth with my husband in a few years, like you and your husband are facing your FIL's right now. Lovely words, by the way. Thank you.

 

[Ridgerunner]

Another reality is that he didn't recognize me any longer. The only person in the world he still remembers is my husband, his second son.

My mother had dementia, my mother-in-law had Alzheimer's. Two different diseases or conditions, however you look at it. This is a very common symptom of both. Many of us on here understand what you are talking about.

Are you working here?
Yes.
I feel that you are pretty professional.
Really, thank you!

I like the way you handled this. No arguments, don't try to educate them. Just keep them calm. It's better for you and them.

It reminds me when Mom would say something like "The boys that live in the wall need shoes." The response was "Tammy said she was getting them some." Tammy is the granddaughter that did a lot to take care of her. Mom was happy to hear that she was getting shoes for the boys. It took us over a year to figure out that the boys that lived in the wall were my two younger brothers when they were very young.

It's not always easy to do what you and your daughter are doing for him but his life is a lot better for it.

 

[Phaedra]

On the way home, this is absolutely the record-breaking grocery, 13 chickens best before tomorrow at half price.

I'm glad that our freezer has sufficient capacity too.

 

[flowerbug]

he is fortunate and i'm glad that he still remembers his son. we have too many elderly friends now who are going through this and it is so sad when they can no longer take care of themselves. in some cases the people have an inner self that is not pleasant and they can be argumentative and/or violent. i fear as my Dad gets older it will be like this, even now he's rather hard to stomach at times and i rarely spend time around him (he also lives a long ways away and i have no desire to visit). as he gets even older and more expressive of his bigotry and hatreds i want even less to do with him. as i live here with Mom and she also has some of this inner problem and i've been very up front about not wanting to ever hear about it. so i'm hoping if she ever goes through the stages of dementia that she will not be like my Dad. the older generation just is not at all happy with change or when things are different. sadly i have no answers to them other than things do change and there's no reason to be hateful and negative about it. the hate and negative does nothing to improve the world a bit. let it go. find other things to do that will make you happy. turn off the hate-tv and find a better life.

 

[baymule]

You have a very kind and loving heart. Your FIL is blessed in ways he does not know, and won’t know.

That is quite a haul on the chicken! That’s how bargain shopping is done!

 

[Rhodie Ranch]

I read in an article that a German company, who owns Aldi, raised prices yesterday almost 50%. I've never been to an Aldi since they are not in my area. But I've heard they have terrific prices and products. Good Chicken buy!!