Garden humor thread..

[Pulsegleaner]

But I'm sure when it showed up for the date, at least it was punctual!

The square root of 3 accused me of cheating. I told it it was being irrational.

 

[flowerbug]

The square root of 3 accused me of cheating. I told it it was being irrational.

transcendental?

 

[Ridgerunner]

Customer - I'm outraged at the cost of this new prescription

Pharmacist - That's one of its many side effects.

 

[Ridgerunner]

He - Wow!!! I feel insignificant... I feel puny... Nothing is as humbling as looking into the night sky.

She - You don't own a mirror?

 

[Dirtmechanic]

He - Wow!!! I feel insignificant... I feel puny... Nothing is as humbling as looking into the night sky.

She - You don't own a mirror?

Somebody was reading the funnies this am! I am glad your day started with laughs!

 

[Ridgerunner]

That's where I get about half of mine. The others mostly come from a local writer in the local newspaper, sent in by readers.

 

[digitS']

Trapped at home for days ..

. missing all the excitement ..

.

 

[Xerocles]

Trapped at home for days ..

. missing all the excitement ..

.

View attachment 35345

where's this place? I haven't had a good dancing sandwich in a l o n g time.

 

[Carol Dee]

 

[Pulsegleaner]

A man walks into a deli and begins licking all the sandwiches. The deli manage says "What the HELL do you think you are doing"

The man points to a sign in the window "Special today; tongue sandwiches"


And around here since there is something called a grandma pizza we have a second meaning for "Let's eat a grandma"

A person correcting an exam read the following line "I rode to camp on my burrow."

To which he answered.

"Your "burro" is you ass. Your "burrow" is a hole in the ground. As a future officer, you are supposed to be able to tell one from the other."


A man leaves a genie in charge of his deli, and goes out. When he comes back he finds a person playing "Stardust" on a piano, a T-bone made of cream cheese on the counter, and a young, muscled, oiled up Sylvester Stallone wearing boxing gloves and a Speedo.

"What the heck is going on?"

"Well, someone came in and said "give me a Hoagie, a Philly Cheese Steak and a hot Balboa."