Fry 4-5 slices thick-cut bacon
Take the bacon out and make it into bacon bits. Save the hot grease. In a big bowl, mix 3 tbsp. white sugar, 3 tbsp. apple cider vinegar, 3 tbsp. water, 1/2 tsp. thyme, 1/2 tsp. salt, 3 finely chopped green onions, whisking until the sugar dissolves. Add the hot grease slowly so you don't splash. Whisk again.
Pour the warm dressing over a really big bowl of 1/2 dandelion leaves and 1/2 Romaine or looseleaf lettuce. The greens will wilt slightly. Sprinkle bacon bits on top.
Pick a big bucket of yellow dandelion flowers. Strip the petals from them, and put the petals in an enamel pot. Boil them in 3 quarts of water, with 1 sliced lemon, 1 sliced orange, 5 pounds of honey, and let cool to room temp. Then strain into a very clean 1 gal. glass bottle (has to be glass, not plastic) and add 1 packet of wine yeast, any kind. Over the top of the bottle, stretch a balloon or put a fermentation lock if you have one. Wait about 1 month, then siphon off all the clear stuff into another 1 gal. glass bottle. Add balloon. Wait another month, then bottle.
Pick some dandelion flowers and rinse the bugs off. Dip them in the following batter, and pan-fry in olive oil. Dip the resulting yummies in ranch dressing.
Batter: 1/2 c. cornmeal, 1/2 c. flour, 1 tsp. baking powder, 3/4 c. milk or buttermilk, 1 tsp. chili powder, 1 tsp. thyme, maybe some Italian seasoning if you like, 3/4 tsp. salt, garlic or onion powder to taste.
I have hardly any dandelions in my yard. I think they're afraid.