Dark humor -- it is laugh or cry?

[Smart Red]

DH woke me up after 2 hours sleep. It seems that while I was asleep, he went to the bathroom and a baby popped out.
I asked if the baby was a boy or a girl.
He said he didn't know.
Where is the baby, I asked
On the floor he said.
Bring it to me and I'll hold it.
I can't, it isn't there. What happened to it?

I couldn't convince DH that he'd had a dream, not a baby. He got up and dressed. He spent the next two hours trying to convince me to get up and help him look -- and take him out for breakfast.

Finally, I got him to come back to bed. Fully dressed, but back in bed. There I got most of another hour sleep before he pushed me out of bed. I moved to try sleeping at the foot of the bed. Resting, but no sleeping before he got back up all wet. I got him in the shower and gave up trying to sleep.

His dreams -- real life to him -- are so not typical of the guy I am used to. I really don't need to be a new parent at this time in my life.

This is a laugher -- or would be if I had enough sleep. That he would dream he had the baby instead of me. Then ask me what God was doing to us. We didn't need a baby.

 

[Nyboy]

Red a lot of my dreams do happen. maybe there is a grand-baby in your future.

 

[Smart Red]

Only if a child we didn't know we had -- his or mine -- shows up on the front stoop with child. Now a great-grand-baby is always possible.

 

[Carol Dee]

Oh Dear @Smart Red I worry about you not getting enough rest. How soon can you get someone in to help. Maybe someone during the day so you can at least nap.

 

[Smart Red]

Son said he'd stop by tonight and make sure I got a good sleep. I suspect he's forgotten. Nothing more was said after he stopped by this morning to do a "rental" chore for us. He has his own family and activities. Anyway, no one knows when or if DH will decide to get up and get dressed.

I tried a short nap this afternoon, but DH decided it was time for supper (2:30 pm) and kept bothering me to get ready to go out. This was after a 1:00 meal at Dairy Queen where we shared chicken strips and fries.

I held him off until nearly 4:30 before leaving for the restaurant. He had a full meal with dessert while soup was more then enough for me. I suppose I should really be in bed already, it is past 8:00 and DH just came in the den to see why I wasn't.

 

[baymule]

Red, he seems to be getting worse. You need some help, you can't go on like this. What about home health care? I have to admit I don't know much about alzheimers but there has to be something that makes your life a little easier. My Mom had a bed alarm, if she got up, it went off. There has to be a way to lock up the doors so he can't get out and shovel snow in the middle of the night too. His hours are so screwy, and you need some rest. If you go down, who's going to take care of your husband?

It is funny that he thought he had a baby. My Mom did the same thing, only she thought she was in Mexico. I told her she was in the hospital, but she insisted she was in Mexico and had a baby. She knew she was 92 years old and marveled at a 92 year old having a baby!

Bottom line is, you can't keep on like this. At some point you will fall out from lack of sleep, exhaustion and just being worn out. What about your son spending the night and you getting a hotel room so you can get some sleep? Not the answer to the problem, I know, but you need some rest. Even if only one night.

 

[Beekissed]

My deepest respect and care for the good caregivers of the world, those lone and steadfast people caring for loved ones in the home. Most oft forgotten by friends and family, they carry on daily on little sleep and tirelessly give their all for another, all for love.

I hope you get some relief and rest, Red. Don't forget that the caregiver cannot give care if they run out of steam. If you have offer of help, snatch it up and take the moment.

 

[thistlebloom]

I have nothing wise or helpful or comforting to say Red.
I'm just so sorry that this awful disease is afflicting your husband.

 

[digitS']

There is something called respite care. Here is an article from AARP: click.

There are social workers at your local Alzheimer's Association. Here is a link for South Central Wisconsin: click.

Here is an American Stroke Association support group finder. Here is the support group for Madison, altho' that may be too far for you: click.

Respite care, when I looked in on it, was at a local hospital. Yes, it was daycare for adults. A few hours with supervision while the caregiver did other things ... like shopping and sleep, I'm sure. Anyway, the support groups and non-profits should have information.

Steve

 

[Beekissed]

Respite care is wonderful! We had that arrangement with a local hospital for our hospice patients as well. They took patients for up to a week for caregiver respite and it was a life saver many times over for our worn out home caregivers.

We also had a network of fine ladies in the community that worked as caregivers for families who had no one in the home to watch their loved ones while they worked, traveled, etc. We were so happy to be able to recommend these trusted workers and depended on them as part of our team.