Dark humor -- it is laugh or cry?

[Gardening with Rabbits]

I have had some of the problems with DH, but it is with steroids or medication. I should be asleep right now. He just goes to bed so early. I can get more sleep by being on his schedule, but it does not work for me. He does not have Alzheimer's though, but I can see if I want sleep, I have to change my schedule. I saw something a year or so ago. I can't find the video, but posting another one and it is about coconut oil and Alzheimer.

 

[Gardening with Rabbits]

Also, I helped take care of my mother, who was getting dementia. She was blind, pacemaker, and just one day started having to wear diapers. She started telling crazy stories like the Beverly Hillbillies were real people and part of our family. She lived next door to me with my brother. He would come and knock on the wall of my bedroom at 2 in the morning needing help with her. We were both exhausted. My kids were very young and it was a hard, hard time with DH having to go to work and my brother and no sleep. We kept this up for a couple of years, and then she had to go to the hospital and ended up in a nursing home. If I had to do it again, I would have got home help. I would not have put her in the nursing home any sooner. It had to be done when it happened. She just needed so much medical care that it could not be done at home, but I look back, and all the days of trying to help her, it would have been better to have outside help. She would have enjoyed visiting with other people. I was getting cranky and short tempered and I did not really understand what my mother was capable of doing and would get upset at her, but later realized she could not help it. I hope you can get some help.

 

[so lucky]

One of the problems we had with my dad, while still at home, was that he wanted to drive, and pestered mom relentlessly. We thought if he had an aide who could take him to town for an hour or so, it might help. One of his long-time pleasures was going to the coffee shop and talking to the regulars there, every day. Since he was a veteran, we were able to get a nice veteran aide to come out, with the idea of being a "guy friend" and take him to the coffee shop, etc. Well, Dad would have no part of it, refused to talk with the man, and threatened to shoot him if he came back.
In Missouri, now, it is possible to hire a relative or friend to be a caregiver. There is minimal, if any, training required. @Smart Red, that might be something you could check out.

 

[journey11]

I'm sorry, Red. I hope you can get some help and some rest.

 

[Ridgerunner]

Many of us have been touched by this disease. My uncle died of Alzheimer's complications in 2014. My Mother-in-law has been in a care facility for Alzheimer's for over ten years. She's been in hospice care three different times and came out each time. You need a long term plan. Day to day doesn't cut it. This disease is emotionally draining and physically draining. Get help.

Yes, talk to the support groups, not just the volunteer groups but your state also. Different states have different programs but there is usually something available. Some of the volunteers are amazing people. Find out what help is available and don't be too proud to accept help. As a teacher you served others for a long time. Let others help you when you need it.

 

[Nyboy]

How is your husband about strangers coming in to house. My parents refused any kind of help because they didn't want people they didn't know it the house.

 

[digitS']

... We also had a network of fine ladies in the community that worked as caregivers ... team.

Doc Martin is back for another season. There was one old show where the elderly man loses his pet bird. After going to the doctor to find out about his bad body odor, it's discovered that the bird died in the briefcase he cares everywhere. The welfare ladies come to his home and help him with personal hygiene ...

First show of the season: After just an incredible morning which includes a sea rescue of a member of a lifesaver crew who suffers a stroke and a broken leg, Martin goes off for an appointment with a psychotherapist.

He has had the presence of mind to seek therapy now that Louisa has left him.

What a cast of characters in that little town! And, Martin ... what is it? Is he autistic? I guess the series show that there is a place for most everyone and even, successful lives. We will see if the lifeguard guy returns ...

Steve

 

[seedcorn]

@Smart Red I feel for you as my mom took care of my Dad. Sounds like you are doing all you can, it's just rough.

As long as you keep family in loop, it's up to them to step up. My Mom (7 hours away) resisted all efforts to move them close to me. Until Dad died, never realized the stuff Dad put Mom through. I was kept in dark or I like to think I would have physically moved them over her objections-but I'll never know.

Having dealt with Alzheimer's, no one should feel bad for putting them in a care facility. When their mind is gone, they are gone. It's just taking care of the body that is left. I am prepared for nursing care as a high probability I will get it.....

 

[Beekissed]

Doc Martin is back for another season. There was one old show where the elderly man loses his pet bird. After going to the doctor to find out about his bad body odor, it's discovered that the bird died in the briefcase he cares everywhere. The welfare ladies come to his home and help him with personal hygiene ...

First show of the season: After just an incredible morning which includes a sea rescue of a member of a lifesaver crew who suffers a stroke and a broken leg, Martin goes off for an appointment with a psychotherapist.

He has had the presence of mind to seek therapy now that Louisa has left him.

What a cast of characters in that little town! And, Martin ... what is it? Is he autistic? I guess the series show that there is a place for most everyone and even, successful lives. We will see if the lifeguard guy returns ...

Steve

I'm thinking "yes"...he very much seems like an Asperger's type of guy.

 

[catjac1975]

Perhaps a tylenol PM or some such medication can get him through the night. A visit to the Dr. seems to be in order to try some meds. The caregiver must stay healthy. I would have freaked out with such a dream being real to him. God bless you and give you help, Red.