Garden humor thread..

[Ridgerunner]

Older lady - Look at that. Is there anything more beautiful than a baby?

Husband - As a matter of fact yes, you.

She - Me?

He - Sure. Babies are beautiful but they come by that beauty naturally. Beautiful old people are works of art.

 

[so lucky]

As I nodded towards a couple on the other side of the restaurant, I said to my husband, "Look at those old farts! That will be us in another 10 years!"
My husband said "That's a mirror, Dummy!"

 

[Carol Dee]

 

[ninnymary]

 

[thistlebloom]

That'll teach ya, young whippersnapper!

 

[Carol Dee]

About right! LoL

 

[so lucky]

About right! LoL
View attachment 32932

I can identify with that.

 

[Ridgerunner]

A young boy showed up at the neighbor's door, suitcase in hand.

I want to come live here; my mama's so mean to me, he stated emphatically.

But you have a wonderful mama, what's wrong? the neighbor asked.

She makes me brush my teeth, he replied.

Well, you are welcome to come live here, but you will still have to brush your teeth. He hung his head and sighed. I guess I'll just go home then. When you're a small boy, some days it seems like the whole world is against you.




A school boy had a test question of what three people from history he'd choose to talk to, so he asked his father for advice.

Isaac Asimov is my favorite author, so he and Buddha are my first two. '' 'Why Buddha and not Jesus?' Naw, I've already read all his stuff. And my third choice is Cleopatra, because I heard she was a hot chick! ''Thanks, Dad; you were a wonderful help as usual"




I went grocery shopping on an empty stomach. I'm now the proud owner of Aisle 5.

 

[digitS']

When you're a small boy, some days it seems like the whole world is against you.

The Little Boy and Old Man

Said the little boy, sometimes I drop my spoon.
Said the little old man, I do that too.

The little boy whispered, I wet my pants.
I do too, laughed the old man ...

~ Shel Silverstein

 

[Carol Dee]