Garden humor thread..

[Pulsegleaner]

View attachment 47095

That sort of depends. If you define a violet as "One of several species in the genus Viola ", then they don't necessarily have to be. There are lavender violets, bright purple violets, pink violets, white violets, even yellow violets. Heck Viola soraria, The common blue violet (i.e. the one most of the people in this country have growing in their yards, and hence the one most of us would probably think of*), comes in purple, white, confederate (white with a purple eye in the middle). Delft (white with purple freckles) and so on.

That actually reminds me of an interesting tidbit, apparently, the world and concept of "orange" (as in the color), didn't exist in Western languages until oranges (the fruit) were introduced. (despite the fact that there are plenty of orange things that would have already been familiar to them.)

Oh, and in traditional Chinese and Japanese speech, "blue" and "green" are considered the same color. In fact, Japanese people refer to the green light in a traffic light as blue, even though it's the same color as ours are.

*As opposed to Europe, where they would probably think of the Parma violet, Viola odorata (the one that actually is the SMELL/TASTE "violet")

 

[Pulsegleaner]

Two of my favorite Churchill-isms (warning second one is a little dirty)

Churchill and de Gaulle were at the White House, meeting with Roosevelt. De Gaulle was gushing about how much the Americans were helping Europe in WWII. He said "We should kiss Roosevelt on both cheeks!".

Churchill paused a minute then said "Yes, but not on all four."

Churchill was on the toilet in his private bathroom one day, when his secretary came in "Sir, he said, the Lord Privy Seal is here to see you"

Churchill yelled back "Tell the Lord Privy Seal I'm sealed in the privy, and can only deal with one **** at a time!"

 

[flowerbug]

Two of my favorite Churchill-isms (warning second one is a little dirty)

Churchill and de Gaulle were at the White House, meeting with Roosevelt. De Gaulle was gushing about how much the Americans were helping Europe in WWII. He said "We should kiss Roosevelt on both cheeks!".

Churchill paused a minute then said "Yes, but not on all four."

Churchill was on the toilet in his private bathroom one day, when his secretary came in "Sir, he said, the Lord Privy Seal is here to see you"

Churchill yelled back "Tell the Lord Privy Seal I'm sealed in the privy, and can only deal with one **** at a time!"

peas tell the pot pie joke as i've not found it after searching, if it is a bit crusty around the edges that's ok, we're a pretty well-seasoned bunch here and not too chicken about hearing it. tanks!

 

[Pulsegleaner]

peas tell the pot pie joke as i've not found it after searching, if it is a bit crusty around the edges that's ok, we're a pretty well-seasoned bunch here and not too chicken about hearing it. tanks!

Not surprised you haven't found it. As I said, it is a VERY old joke, as in it dates from the 1800's (or maybe earlier). I only know it because Dover Books publishes (or did publish) a re-print of a 19th century joke and riddle book. (I think it was called 1000 Riddles, Enigmas and Conundrums).

Anyhow, the answer to "Why is a chicken pot pie like a gunsmith's shop?" is "Because they both have fowl-in-pieces." (fowling pieces are a kind of small gun used for bird hunting back then.)

Another one (the only other one I remember that wasn't a rebus, and hence unshowable here [since I can't draw])
was

"Why will a one winged chicken always fight with a two winged chicken?"

"Because there is a difference of a pinion between them."

 

[Carol Dee]

 

[digitS']

Rebus?

I drive drive a small Sub.a.r.u.

In a busy parking lot: When I have to assert myself in reverse out of a parking space I tell my car, "u r a bus!" Works every time.

digitS'
i'll stop ...

 

[Pulsegleaner]

Rebus?

Oh, a rebus is a group of pictures that represent syllables or words. Like say a picture of an eye, a heart, and the letter "U" for "I love you."

 

[Ridgerunner]

Trooper: 'When I saw you driving down the road, I guessed 65 at least.
Driver: 'You're wrong, officer; my hat makes me look that old. I'm really 50!

 

[Ridgerunner]

A police helicopter hovering overhead spotted a speeder and reported him to a trooper in a car, who chased down the offender. As the trooper was writing a ticket, the offender asked, ''How did you catch me? I didn't see any cars.''

The trooper, still writing, pointed to the sky.

The driver cried, ''Come on, man; GOD didn't tell you!''

 

[digitS']

a picture of an eye, a heart, and the letter "U" for "I love you."