...I hate alcoholics....

[secuono]

...Should of known better than to marry anyone who drinks. Should of known better than to marry anyone who smokes. Should of known better than to marry anyone who still lives with their mother...
But now I have all my animals to care for, can't get a job what-so-ever...
If I won the lotto, you bet your bum I'd be gone with all my animals in a heartbeat, even though it isn't bad and 99.98% of the time it isn't worth noting. But the rare, once, twice a year bullcrud, no, I would be gone in a second if I won the lotto.
It's like dealing with a special ed child and I don't even like to deal with typical children. Ugh. Just have to rant a bit, have no friends to rant/talk to. And no, there is no fear, abuse and all that, just regret of getting myself into this even in the slightest. Rather live alone than deal with other people's issues.
*sigh* I hate having a one bathroom house...lol
What works to get them to realize their issues? What works to get their co-workers to stop promoting this crud? I mean, he can't get away from his co-workers. Don't think anyone would believe he has an issue, he's kind of like me, no real friends, isn't that close to family for them to know. His father was or still is an alcoholic, surely doesn't make him think twice, his mother left him because of what a crudshoot his dad is.
So annoying how everyone is stupid over marriage, having kids, dating, etc. None of that is needed, but from the time you're born, that is drilled into your head from everyone around you.
Anyway, anyone else dating/married/previously lived with an alcoholic?
How'd it go, any change, any tips, anyone split up or fix it, etc?

 

[sumi]

My mom was an alcoholic, one of those crazy violent ones. She finally stopped drinking when I was 17. And promptly switched to prescription drugs. DH is not an alcoholic, but he likes his drink, if you get my drift. No comment on marriage/dating/etc. LOL We're separating. Not because of his drinking, a bunch of other stuff.

From what I've seen with my mom, only a GOOD rehab centre is the only thing that will help if the problem is bad and they have to accept and admit that they have a problem in the first place, otherwise it's not going to work.

If you want to vent or need to talk to someone, you're welcome to shoot me a PM. Been there, done that. I know how difficult it is

 

[buckabucka]

I would look for a local section of ala-non (I'm not sure that is what it is called, but it is a support group for people living with alcoholics). Maybe they even have an on-line group these days. You will find lots of people in the same boat.
Good luck on your journey!

 

[canesisters]

wish I could offer more....

 

[TheSeedObsesser]

Never dated/married/lived with an alcoholic but do have one as a neighbor (he's luckily one of the very nice, sort of weird types). I'm not an alholic myself. And I've never fixed any alcoholics' problems. So I can't say if there is anything that you might be able to do about - unless it's strapping him to a chair for a couple of weeks, but that's effectively torture and probably won't help anything.

There has to be some sort of hotline out there that you could call that could at least lead you in the right direction. I've also heard of the group that buckabucka mentioned, but can't remember the right name either. I would look into the group if I were you, I've heard good things about it.

Best of luck!

 

[Nyboy]

Vent away we are here, sometimes you just need a shoulder to cry on, to feel better

 

[Rhodie Ranch]

Hugs. From me to you.

 

[secuono]

He's the type of drunk most girls are stereo-typically labeled as.
He's the only one with a job, so he can't just vanish for 1-3mo to go to a real clinic to get help.
TheSeedObsesser, lol, wish I could lock him up in a giant hamster cage on days he's off work.
I'll look around for those groups. Anyone know if there are short clinics for alcoholics he could go to if he used up all vaca/sick days?

 

[so lucky]

@secuono, I really feel for you. I've been in your shoes, but with a couple of kids to have to worry about, too, way back then.
Just want remind you that if he doesn't want to get help; doesn't really really want to stop drinking, there is nothing in the world that you can do. My youngest son is an alcoholic now, too, but has been taking a drug that takes the craving to drink away. He says it works well; of course he had to test it by drinking a beer, and said it didn't taste good.
The medicine is called Naltrexone, if your DH ever gets to that point.
The thing is, you need to take care of yourself. If you have to leave, do it. Give all your critters away, find a job, and get out. Otherwise, it will kill both of you.

 

[Sam BigDeer]

www.aa.org (edited to correct extension, Canesisters points out in next post the original link was wrong, Thank You, Debbie!)
Alcoholics Anonymous is probably the organization you folks are referring to...
BUT, As some one has already mentioned, the person with the 'problem' has to realize that there is a problem and actually wANT to be helped.. Coercion, generally speaking, will just make them 'sneaky/sly'...
Sam