The Lone Gardener

[Ridgerunner]

We’ve worked out arrangements that work for us. I fully understand the concept of hers and ours and I respect those boundaries. I also understand that just because she says something is ours it’s often not really. But that can get tricky at times.

I do all the prep work, seed starting, plant purchasing, planting, weeding, mulching, trellising or caging, pest control, harvesting, dehydrating, freezing, and canning. Occasionally she’ll mention she’d like me to grow something specific, usually when it’s getting pretty late in the season, but I try to accommodate her as much as I can. She will on rare occasions go get some herbs herself or maybe even a veggie to fix, but I usually cook the veggies for supper, either fresh or from the freezer. She will open a jar of green beans, corn, beets, stuff like that from the pantry, and heat it up.

I generally stay out of her weaving unless she asks, then of course she has priority. On her big loom I usually take the beater off and put it back on as she needs, help her warp the yarn, and occasionally help with tie-ups. And I’ve built storage racks and cubicles and a few tools that help her like a spooling rack and a raddle. But only when she asks.

 

[NwMtGardener]

@Ridgerunner - what a good mom and wife you have, to have trained you so well...

 

[catjac1975]

My husband does the tilling, hauling and spreading of manure and likes to plant corn and peas. He's never been much of a weeder but will weed corn. Hoping for more help now that he has 2 new knees.

 

[Ridgerunner]

Heather you'll notice I didn't say anything about my stuff. It doesn't exist, it's either hers or ours. About a week ago she took a walking stick I was using to hang my coats on high hooks in the garage to use for her loom. No word to me, just took it. If I'd done something like that to her she'd be all upset. I'd be all selfish, thoughtless, and uncaring, just a real brute. But there is nothing wrong with her taking it. She's a woman. I learned that long ago.

Control what you can, accept what you can't, and strive to know the difference.

 

[NwMtGardener]

"she's a woman." that explains it all!

 

[ducks4you]

I wanna go back to, "Don't tell me to answer the phone...or that it's getting dark..."

 

[Wishin']

You guys aren't so perfect yourself you know. Males and females both have their advantages and disadvantages, one gender more then the other especially in the opposites genders eyes.
What can I say humans are flawed

 

[Smart Red]

DH does help in the yard and gardens. He prefers working in the flower beds and leaves most of the veggie work to me. He will 'offer' to do anything that I ask, but won't see anything that needs doing with the veggies on his own.

DH rakes the yard spring and fall and keeps the dead wood picked up. I do all the mowing while he's weeding somewhere or digging trees out back. Yup! We both like working outside and make a pretty good team. It is inside where the partnership fails a bit. I do all the cooking, cleaning, canning, and laundry. Occasionally he turns the TV off and on. Mostly my fault. I forget to ask for his help and I spoil him like his mother did.

Now, DS is offering to do anything that's too hard for me so DH is free to work on his own projects unhampered by my 'honey-do' suggestions. I am a flawed female living with a perfect, but aging super-being. It's hard to bite my tongue and not ask the MAN who hung the moon over a rose garden to make a place to hang baskets. Did I mention I love that MAN?

 

[thistlebloom]

@Ridgerunner, I laughed at "hers and ours", probably because I recognized myself a little....

I have always respected his work tools and wouldn't dream of getting into them, but the "general" tools in the garage are fair game, and I really do try to put them back where I found them. That may be why he buys me so many tools of my own, sort of a self defense move. Haha.

I forgot something important that he does on the property while I was listing all the things I do alone ( and feeling a tad self righteous maybe?).
We have a lot of pine woods that need thinning and limbing up and it's an overwhelming job, but he has now taken on that responsibility almost exclusively, except for some rare occasions when I help haul the limbs or saplings out to the cleared area to be dragged to the shredder or burn pile.
If it can't be done with a mower or a chain saw he's pretty much happy to leave it to me.

 

[ninnymary]

Ridgerunner, you sound like a keeper.

Totally opposite of my husband! Drives me crazy sometimes. I had to leave last night without finishing the cornbread. Told him all the dry ingredients were mixed already. Gave him the recipe and told him he just had to beat the egg, milk, and melted butter and add to the dry ingredients. How hard is that? I even took out the muffin pan and left the Pam spray next to it. Geeze..came back muffins were made but instead of 18 he did 12. Said now I only had to eat 1 instead of 2!

Mary