It seems forever since I posted about DH. IT has been a long month I guess. DH went to heaven yesterday evening. Two weeks after my last post above, DS turned 18 and DH was in the hospital again having fluid drained. In the days and couple of weeks since, he was getting more confused. I thought it was the fluid and so Sunday we took him to the ER. They said the fluid had to be drained and they wanted to put this catheter in so the fluid could be drained at home next time. He seemed happy and relaxed he would be going home and he had already had this done before, but the next day after they put it in, he was not opening his eyes. I thought the anesthetic, but as the day went they said his body was shutting down. I know realize that it was happening at home and we did not know it. Since he had all the brain damage, he was not able to tell me how he really felt and he did not seem in pain, but something was wrong. I did not know it was serious so I did not act different, and he spent his last days thinking life was okay watching movies, eating and being with us and at the hospital he became more and more lethargic and they sent him to Hospice House on Tuesday and he was unresponsive. DD was with him, and DS and I came in and I asked how he was and she said no change. We talked a minute and DS said DH's eyes were open. I looked and I said are you awake? Hi honey and the kids said hi dad,and earlier his pupils the nurse had told us were pinpoints and fixed, his eyes were open, pupils normal and he looked at something and just left. The nurses later said he was waiting for DS and me to get in the room and I said, DH had no power over his eyes. He could not open them or even make that decision, but God gave us that blessing. We all had prayed from the beginning I guess over 2 years ago that he would never suffer and DH and always said it was okay, he would just go to sleep and feel no pain and I had prayed my kids would be spared being traumatized over this, and I really believe DD needed this more than I did, but God had to have waited at that moment and he told Andy to open his eyes and wake up. My children felt blessed and at least I had 2 years to prepare for this in some way. I slowly lost my husband each month and year. I am not in shock like I was in the first months of his diagnosis and the fear and sadness. We will be okay. Thank you for all the kind words and prayers.
as many little smiles as possible, GWR. Whatever you can do, wherever you need to be ...
