Garden humor thread..

[baymule]

AAAAANNNNDDDDDD don't forget the bathroom WEIGHT SCALES!!!

 

[Nyboy]

one day I was in my yard, when there was sound of breaking glass from house next door. When I looked over the bathroom window was broken and a scale was on the ground under window. Talk about bad mood from diet.

 

[thistlebloom]

I have an easy way to keep the mirror my friend. We have a 4 light bar over the vanity, and as of now 2 of the bulbs have burned out. Dh asked me when I was going to pick up more bulbs and I said probably never. When the other two burn out I'll use a candle, and then I'll REALLY be lookin' good!

 

[Nyboy]

Thistle I agree everybody looks better in candle light.

 

[so lucky]

I look so much better with my glasses off.

 

[Carol Dee]

A mirror and scales that are out of order, candlelight and no glasses. Might just do the trick for me.

 

[britesea]

Good Exercise

I came across this exercise suggested for seniors to build muscle strength in the arms and shoulders. It seems so easy, so I thought I'd pass it on. The article suggested doing it three days a week. Begin by standing on a comfortable surface where you have plenty of room on each side.

With a five pound potato sack in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a full minute, then relax. Each day, you'll find that you can hold the position for just a bit longer.

After a couple of weeks, move up to a 10 lb. potato sack. Then 50 lb. potato sacks and then eventually try to get to where you can lift a 100 lb. potato sack in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute.

Once you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each of the sacks.

 

[ninnymary]

That's a good one britesea! Ha

Mary

 

[baymule]

Last year, I replaced, like, all the windows in my house with those expensive, double-pane, energy-efficient kind.

Today, I, like, got a call from the contractor who installed them.

He complained that the work had been completed a year ago. and I still hadn't, like, paid for them. OMG!

Hellloooo,............ Just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I'm, like, automatically stupid.

So, I told him just what his fast-talking sales guy told me last year -- that these windows would, like,

pay for themselves in a year.


Helllooooo? It's been a year, so they're, like, paid for, I told him.

There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally hung up.

He never called back.

I bet he felt like an idiot.

 

[canesisters]

"like!"