My Dad

[Nyboy]

Funny story my dad lives alone. About a year ago my 2 sisters and I each got a key in the mail, no note no card, my dads return address. I called him up to ask about the keys. He told me if his time came and the door was locked we could unlock it. Your dead do you really think a kicked in door will matter. He said I assumed you would break a window it would be cheaper to repair.

 

[Carol Dee]

@Nyboy I like the way your Dad thinks LOL

 

[journey11]

Funny story my dad lives alone. About a year ago my 2 sisters and I each got a key in the mail, no note no card, my dads return address. I called him up to ask about the keys. He told me if his time came and the door was locked we could unlock it. Your dead do you really think a kicked in door will matter. He said I assumed you would break a window it would be cheaper to repair.

What a hoot! That sounds like something my dad would do too. I've never seen anyone pinch a penny like he can. There are two meds to go with his chemo ordered, one for nausea and one for constipation. He told me to cancel them (which I'm not), because he'd rather be uncomfortable than pay the extra. I think this explains why he has a large sum in his checking account right now. He also had $6000 cash in his sock drawer that remained out of $10,000 that was given to him from his grandmother when she passed over 10 years ago. I had to make him put it in the bank!

 

[thistlebloom]

Gee, I would have left the 6k in the sock drawer...

 

[journey11]

Gee, I would have left the 6k in the sock drawer...

I would have, but my brother and his druggie girlfriend were staying at night with him when he first got out of the hospital. My brother has never stolen from him, but his crack-head friends have, multiple times. I don't trust her.

 

[thistlebloom]

I would have, but my brother and his druggie girlfriend were staying at night with him when he first got out of the hospital. My brother has never stolen from him, but his crack-head friends have, multiple times. I don't trust her.

Oh, good plan then Journey.

 

[Nyboy]

Old timers can really pinch that penny

 

[Gardening with Rabbits]

I was going to come back the other day when I said it might not be a blood clot and post, but it probably is. I know the doctor was just really upset about his leg, so I would show it to them and make sure. DH if I remember right did not have redness, but his whole leg was swollen. I am so glad your dad is going to go ahead and do treatment. I have not read about the pill form, but I did hear it was a lot easier, and with all the new things happening with cancer, they will be able to monitor him and offer him the best treatment available. It is just overwhelming. I know what you mean about the SSI and explaining. I was so concerned about cancer first, then brain surgery, then radiation, then chemo, then immunotherapy, and all the insurance dropping, bills, Medicaid, disability, and at the moment, I do not have insurance and probably won't until October, I may never be the same myself, much less DH. It is a lot to go through. Radiation was the hardest on DH.

 

[journey11]

I was going to come back the other day when I said it might not be a blood clot and post, but it probably is. I know the doctor was just really upset about his leg, so I would show it to them and make sure. DH if I remember right did not have redness, but his whole leg was swollen. I am so glad your dad is going to go ahead and do treatment. I have not read about the pill form, but I did hear it was a lot easier, and with all the new things happening with cancer, they will be able to monitor him and offer him the best treatment available. It is just overwhelming. I know what you mean about the SSI and explaining. I was so concerned about cancer first, then brain surgery, then radiation, then chemo, then immunotherapy, and all the insurance dropping, bills, Medicaid, disability, and at the moment, I do not have insurance and probably won't until October, I may never be the same myself, much less DH. It is a lot to go through. Radiation was the hardest on DH.

Yes, I am still worried about it too and kicking myself for not mentioning it the other day (after being so freaked out about it days before. ) All will have been in vain if I let him ignore a small, but insidious blood clot.

I am so sorry to hear that you guys have lost your insurance, GWR. So your DH does get the Medicaid himself then? I hear they give good coverage, but you would still have worries hoping to stay well yourself. And that makes it all that much more important to take good care of yourself and take time out for yourself while caring for your husband. Don't want to get rundown, that's for sure.

With the chaos of the bottom dropping out of everything in your life and all the trips to the doctors and hospital, the influx of paperwork and phone calls is almost unbearable. Some days my brain is too tired and can't juggle it all. I'd be lost without the big green binder I made to organize all of Dad's business in and my phone to quickly store notes, dates and phone numbers. The binder goes with me everywhere. On top of managing all of that, the constant calls from family and friends wanting to know how Dad is doing has eaten up all of my spare time and stressed me out having to repeat the details over and over again. I need to find a way to direct all those calls to my sister who has more time to field them than I do. The business calls to doctors, insurance and the SSA is about all I can handle for now.

Then there are my poor kids and husband on the back burner. I feel like I'm neglecting them. We have just been squeezing in the basics for school right now, no time for field trips, crafts and projects, which makes for one very bored student. But I guess that's one of the nice benefits of homeschooling, the flexibility to take it up later. We will catch up this summer. And we've been doing Saturday schooldays too. DH has been doing my chores for me, which is a big help, but I miss the enjoyment and relaxing rhythm of doing my outside work. I did manage to get out and prune my apple tree the other day. Best therapy ever.

I hope my dad will bear with it throughout the 6 weeks of radiation. I'm afraid he'll get aggravated and try to bail out. He does not like or trust doctors much as it is.

 

[thistlebloom]

I haven't been in your shoes Journey, so my advice is only this, if you can get your siblings to do even the most basic things to help, by all means let them. I don't mean that as though you are wanting to do everything yourself, but I know how things worked when we were trying to straighten out my parents affairs.

My older sister seems much like you, very organized, and in her case she is a "fixer".
She handled just about everything even though I told her to give some of that responsibility to me for phone calls etc.
It was a little more difficult in our case because we are all so geographically scattered and she had all the records for everything.

Maybe you could only pick up the phone for important calls from doctors, and ask your sister to call back all the other concerned friends.